I'm back

Well, I knew I was going to take a short break from blogging. I didn't think we would have been quite this long. I am planning on posting my menus again too.

It has been a crazy 6 months or so. Back in May, my husband was laid off. He had been with the company for 22 years, so it was a total shock. But God is good, and although he has yet to find something, we have seen His hand in it all. The timing, although horrible at the time for us, was actually perfect. Actually, he is now working as consultant for a few weeks, and then hopefully he will be hired permanently.

I was teaching preschool 2 days a week last year, and in September I started working four days. Two days teaching young 3's and two days teaching young 2's. I love it, although it is exhausting! But Princess is going to pre-k for free, so it works well. My house on the other hand looks like a bomb went off....every 3 seconds! I've decided that it's pretty bad when you hope a hurricane hits your house (as long as everyone is safe). At least that would be a great excuse on why it looks the way it does.

So I've been struggling with loads of feelings this last few months. The greatest one, I can't do it. I don't have it in me. I love my husband, I love my kids. But to have everything else going on, and then to deal with the never ceasing demands of a special needs child. It can put one in major overload. But there is never a boring or dull moment around here, and I have to admit I do like that!

Well, I will be posting more later. And hopefully my thoughts will be a bit more put together.

Life can be so short

Life is so precious. So short. So full of happiness, sadness, bliss, love, and so much more. And when someone special touches your life, and that of your child is suddenly gone....what do you do?

Mrs. Guirguis was Science boys third grade teacher. School just ended last Thursday. I saw her, gave her gifts - some of which I made because she loved everything I made and science boy insisted - gave her a hug and said we would see her at the pool this summer. And now she's gone. Just one day after school was over she died in a car accident. She had 2 children and was to be married again this summer. She was in a good place in her life. She was always so joyful, so full of life. She really cared about her students, you could tell that teaching was more than a job to her, it was her mission. And sadly, this last school year was her last mission. God needed her home............I know that. But when someone so young is taken in such a split second it's almost - no not almost - it is surreal.

How do you tell your 9 year old that one of the most important people in his life is gone. She did so much for him, and believed in him so much - just like she believed in each and everyone of her students. She is one of a handful of teachers that I've come across that sees the child for the child...sees past what society may have done to the child...sees the core of the child...and brings that to the surface. Each child was an individual to her, and learned differently. She found out the best way to reach the child and they soared because of it. Don't we all just need someone to love us no matter what, push us and be there to watch us fly? Ms. Guirguis was one of the best.

As is probably the case for most of her students - I, the parent, am having a more difficult time with this. I'm the one breaking down in tears when I think about it or read the newspaper article. I think it's because there are so many unanswered questions. An investigation is still going on, so not much has been released. Science boy is sad, talks a bit about her, and goes on. We've talked about how God has a plan for us all, how he was so blessed to have been in her class...out of all the third graders he and his friends were chosen to be part of her last mission here on earth. And that satisfies him, he doesn't need the answers that we adults need. His heart accepts that as much as he will miss her, her work here is done. The only unanswered questions to him are what is going to happen to her children (he knows one of them), and why she was the only one killed...why not someone else in the car....why her. And after talking about that, he's satisfied.

All that knew her still have a lot of healing to do. If you believe in the power of prayer - please pray for her children, her family, friends, co-workers and students.

Ms. Guirguis you will be missed and I will think of you often. But now you have the best seat to watch your students soar.

With love and a heavy heart....

Say it ain't so........

Ok, it can not be. Please someone till me that I have blogged some since March. How and where did the time go so fast?????

I know a ton or so have happened since then, and I've been crazy busy. But I didn't think it was any busier than normal. But here we are, school is out...summer is around the corner.

May was an extremely busy month for us. And even held a few surprises. May 5th science boy turned 9 (I cried....I mean think about it in 9 years he'll be going off to college....The same amount of time that he's been here with us (I swear it was just a few days ago I was holding a smallish bundle of baby in my arms)he'll be leaving us to go to college. Wow!). On May 10th lego boy turned 7. It just boggles my mind how much he has accomplished this year. Plus he got his BAHA in April, what a difference!. My husband got laid off around this time...after 22 years with the same company.....don't get me started. But faith in God is an amazing thing, and we know that the right job is waiting.

Little Princess and mine last day of school was May 21st. My husband's b-day was May 22nd. The boy's school carnival was the last weekend in May...in which somehow I was in charge of all the crafts - this was being planned for months, as I was also planning 2 b-day parities, my class' end-of-school party, and lego boys last day of school party (I'm the room mom). Then I was offered a job at the other MDO our church does...so next fall I'll be working 4 days. And to top it all off, it was the 20th anniversary of my 21st birthday on June 2nd. Phew!

The boys' school ended last Thursday....and with a bang. Little Princess got a fever Wed. night. Then Science boy got it about 1 hour after school on Thursday. So we went off to one of those after hour pediatric urgent care places. Little Princess had a fever of 104.9!!! So far it looks like it's just a virus...and they still have fever. So far just Little Princess and Science Boy have them. But I was told that they could have the fever for up to a week. Oh what fun!

Spring Break

Growing up I always loved Spring Break. A whole week off school. It didn't matter if we were going anywhere or staying home. I never did like school, so any excuse to be away from it was wonderful! Playing for hours with my friends, torturing...I mean playing...with my younger brothers - doing anything was a welcome escape.

Then as a mom of one it wasn't too bad. I was very pregnant with my second child when my oldest started Mother's Day Out. So it was a great time to spend some quality time with him before both of our worlds were completely changed forever.

When my second child started preschool, it was crazy. He was in a different school district (due to going to a regional day school for the deaf) - so the boys Spring Breaks were different. One the week before the other. Plus I had had little princess by then...so life didn't change to much. I just had an extra child to take on errands, and dropping off/picking up one of the boys.

Now that I'm a teacher at my daughter's MDO, and a mom...Spring Break brings mixed emotions. I get a week off (no pay though), and my kids will be home. Wonderful and at the same time I know it's going to be hectic.

Now don't get me wrong. I love my kids, but it's been a long week so far (and it's only Wednesday). Monday I discovered...wait for it....lice! Ugh!!! now you'll be scratching your head all day...sorry. So I've been combing hair, shampooing, spraying and doing loads and loads and loads of laundry. And today I still found one in little princess' hair and one in mine. Help!!!! Plus yesterday it rained all day...so we couldn't even go outside to play. Ok, I'm sounding panicky now. I just hate lice! And I have long hair! The kids are getting cabin fever and doing everything they can to push each other's (and mine) buttons, we've had to cancel playdates, and my husband has been working very late.

I hope everyone else is having a much better spring break then we are! And if you have any suggestions for a lice infestation....please feel free to let me know. Gotta go and do more laundry!

Well, I think the kids are finally all feeling better. Last week little princess was "flu like" (the flu test was negative), Lego Boy had a sinus infection, Science boy wasn't feeling well, and I had had about enough of it all. The house is a complete mess, I'm exhausted, and the more I look around the house, the more exhausted I get. Does it ever get better?

I used to be very organized, everything in it's place, etc. Ok, OCD is more like it. Cans all lined up, alphabetically in my pantry. Music and movies all alphabetical, music alphabetical and arranged by different types, etc, etc. I obsessed at work if I forgot to put a pair of shoes away, it bugged me all day. Then I got married, I still kept up with my OCD habits, I mopped my floor 2 - 3 times a week, vacuumed all the time, you get the picture. Then I had one child....I still look at the pictures I have and say "oh look, a clean house". Things weren't totally put away. The kitchen counters had stuff on them, but still relativity clean and put away. Then I had another baby, and got very, very sick. Got diagnosed, felt better, got pregnant again. So I had a 4 1/2, 2 1/2, and a newborn. What was I thinking??????(but that's another story) Now the house should be condemned...ok not that bad all the time. But it's still got stuff (toys, papers, craft stuff, etc) everywhere. It's madness I tell you. Just when I think I've got part of the house together, and go work on another part either one of the little people living here, or the other big person, messes it up somehow. It's a never ending process. One day I will toss everything out. Including clothes. I swear I want to have nude days here, I'm becoming anti-clothes just because I'm tired of picking them up off the floor, washing them, sorting them on my bed, then having my husband move them from the bed to another piece of furniture in our room, re-sorting them on our bed, putting them away, picking them (and more)clothes off the floor. I told my husband I need a wife, not for him, for me. He would get nothing out of it...well maybe I could be a better wife to him if I wasn't frustrated(?) But me, I could have a clean house (for about 5 minutes), and somehow it doesn't upset me when the kids mess up the house after someone else cleaned it, just when I do.

I used to have a cleaning lady, how I loved her and miss her dearly. But expensive. I've actually said that if I got paid what she did, it might make a wee bit of difference, I might actually think about it a little more often. Right now I work two days a week teaching at my daughter's Mother's Day Out Program. It's great because she goes free, and I get paid a little. In the fall she'll be going 4 times a week, and I'm thinking of working all four days, just so the extra money can go to a cleaning lady.

I'm hoping that soon, real soon I can get into some sort of routine and do all I need to do. Of course, now it will be even harder since I don't have any free time of my own. Oh, wow, now I sound like I'm whining. It's late and I'm tired, and I guess I've lost my train of thought. Go figure.

Menu Plan Monday

After a long time of not posting I'm back. Until a few weeks ago I was still planning my menus but things have gotten crazy around here. So I've decided to start blogging again, and posting my menus. Thanks to Laura for hosting Menu Plan Monday.

Oh, and for some reason my spell checker is not working, so please ignore any misspellings.

Monday - Roasted chicken legs, rice, brocolli
Tuesday - Cranberry balsamic pork tenderloin, roasted potatoes, corn
Wednesday- Chicken fajitas, mexican rice, refried bean, queso
Thursday - Easy Baked Parmesan Meatballs, Spaghettti & sauce (either GF spaghetti for me, for spaghetti squash), salad
Friday - Family pizza and movie night
Saturday - Husband and kids to his parents for dinner, I'm planning on having friends over for dinner and scrapbooking and serving them Maple Chicken'n'ribs, and Ice Cream Cake with Butterscotch Sauce

Have a wonderful week.

Heroes

When we think of heroes, many different images may pop into our head. Superheros are probably the first thing. Superman, Batman, Spiderman, Wonderwoman (oh, how I loved that show!), etc. Using their super powers to win against the bad guys. (In fact as I'm writing this, my kids are playing Star Wars. I'm not sure who the boys are, but Little Princess is shouting "Let me in guys, this is Princess Leia" As the sound of lightsabers are heard through the closed door).

Or perhaps a historic person comes to mind. Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Thersea, to name two.

But my hero. My hero is Lego Boy, my 6 1/2 year old son. I've been thinking of this for a while, and on January 10th, 2008 he earned his place as my top hero. Lego Boy was born with profound hearing loss in one ear, he has speech apraxia, and also has autism. On January 10th, he had a Baha hearing aide implant. This was probably most troublesome to me. To see him laying in a hospital bed, his ear bleeding (he also had a hole in his eardrum fixed), a 3X2 inch bald spot behind his ear with a bloody gauze, a metal "snap" with a plastic cap on, plus a "c" shaped incision....what kind of mother was I to elect to have this done to my child! To see him fight against us giving him pain meds..right after surgery. It took 4 of us, 2 nurses, my husband and myself to hold him down and get the medicine down his throat. While he was thrashing about, his IV came out, more blood gushed from his ear...what a sight.

Later I told him he was my hero. "No, I'm not a hero..just a kid" he replied.

A hero is someone who lives their life how it should be lived. Who does not think about how others view them. They are not embarrassed when they are under a table in a restaurant screaming and crying. While their older brother is so embarrassed, their mother thinks "not again, ", the family they are sitting with does not know what to say or do, and their younger sister and father ignore it all. I've learned just to say "Oh, I'm sorry he has autism". The smiles and the talk then start. Questions asked. All is well. Then the hero gets up, sits on his mama's lap and proceeds to eat her food, not caring or acknowledging what has happened.

A hero is someone who goes to school, plays with friends even though he is hard to be understood, does not have acceptable social graces...and yet his friends accept him as he is..and he accepts himself.

Isn't that what it comes down to...accepting oneself flaws and all? And what kind of mother puts her child through that kind of surgery...a good one..one that sees the big picture how his quality of life will improve. And no matter what he says that 6 1/2 year old is and always will be my hero.