Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Well, I think the kids are finally all feeling better. Last week little princess was "flu like" (the flu test was negative), Lego Boy had a sinus infection, Science boy wasn't feeling well, and I had had about enough of it all. The house is a complete mess, I'm exhausted, and the more I look around the house, the more exhausted I get. Does it ever get better?

I used to be very organized, everything in it's place, etc. Ok, OCD is more like it. Cans all lined up, alphabetically in my pantry. Music and movies all alphabetical, music alphabetical and arranged by different types, etc, etc. I obsessed at work if I forgot to put a pair of shoes away, it bugged me all day. Then I got married, I still kept up with my OCD habits, I mopped my floor 2 - 3 times a week, vacuumed all the time, you get the picture. Then I had one child....I still look at the pictures I have and say "oh look, a clean house". Things weren't totally put away. The kitchen counters had stuff on them, but still relativity clean and put away. Then I had another baby, and got very, very sick. Got diagnosed, felt better, got pregnant again. So I had a 4 1/2, 2 1/2, and a newborn. What was I thinking??????(but that's another story) Now the house should be condemned...ok not that bad all the time. But it's still got stuff (toys, papers, craft stuff, etc) everywhere. It's madness I tell you. Just when I think I've got part of the house together, and go work on another part either one of the little people living here, or the other big person, messes it up somehow. It's a never ending process. One day I will toss everything out. Including clothes. I swear I want to have nude days here, I'm becoming anti-clothes just because I'm tired of picking them up off the floor, washing them, sorting them on my bed, then having my husband move them from the bed to another piece of furniture in our room, re-sorting them on our bed, putting them away, picking them (and more)clothes off the floor. I told my husband I need a wife, not for him, for me. He would get nothing out of it...well maybe I could be a better wife to him if I wasn't frustrated(?) But me, I could have a clean house (for about 5 minutes), and somehow it doesn't upset me when the kids mess up the house after someone else cleaned it, just when I do.

I used to have a cleaning lady, how I loved her and miss her dearly. But expensive. I've actually said that if I got paid what she did, it might make a wee bit of difference, I might actually think about it a little more often. Right now I work two days a week teaching at my daughter's Mother's Day Out Program. It's great because she goes free, and I get paid a little. In the fall she'll be going 4 times a week, and I'm thinking of working all four days, just so the extra money can go to a cleaning lady.

I'm hoping that soon, real soon I can get into some sort of routine and do all I need to do. Of course, now it will be even harder since I don't have any free time of my own. Oh, wow, now I sound like I'm whining. It's late and I'm tired, and I guess I've lost my train of thought. Go figure.